Much like the Russ song, it truly has been. The concept of the title took me some time to get used to. I think that's what my problem always was. I get so caught up and hell bent towards achieving a certain goal, I find myself constantly imagining and soaking in the potential feeling of victory. I drown myself in that feeling, since it allows for whatever bitter journey I'm on to taste just a little sweet, even though I know it's temporary. Then, when I do summit the mountain I was climbing, instead of basking in the glory of completion and indulging in the views, my mind has already begun racing towards the next thing. On to the next goal, planning the next summit, laying the next brick.
Isn't happiness supposed to be where you are? Not where you think it should be?
I spent the last 3 years obsessively running after a professional designation. I was always behind a desk, whether for work, or study, or even leisure at that point. I did it, because it would set me up for life. I mean, at least "they" said it would. Apparently, that profession is supposed to be replaced by a computer in the next 10 years. So that's that, isn't it?
I just toiled away on the daily, clocked in and clocked out. Rinse and repeat. At another desk, behind another laptop, shaking another hand, and reporting to another face. All this, just to fill someone else's pockets, while taking home a meagre percentage for myself. Yes, surely my bills were paid. Some of my materialistic dreams were even fulfilled. In the eyes of "society", I guess I did somewhat well for myself. But, am I on earth just to play by their rules? Was I born JUST to go to school, get a job, pay some bills, find a wife, have a kid, vacay on the beach, hope to avoid some illness, and then pass away in my sleep?
Surely there has to be a purpose behind my (or our) time here.
All that, gave birth to this website and the content housed within it. It's to create a platform to do more, say more and show more, in order to inspire more. For more than a year now, I have spent a significant amount of time in solitude, and believe me, it does wonders for bringing more clarity into your life. You see, hear, and feel different. Not to mention the immensely positive boost to your mental health, when you actively make the choice to separate yourself from the toxic environment that once depleted every ounce of energy from your body. Granted, I have an amazing set of playing cards that were drawn during the inception of my life to be grateful for. My circumstances and the people that associate themselves with me, are blessings beyond anything I could have ever hoped for. These are factors that I can only attribute to a divine hand.
So shouldn't I just kick back, relax and enjoy it all for myself?
That attitude is never going to bring about any value in my life, or yours. Especially with what's going on in the world we live in today. We need hope, we need change, we need a different mindset.
If you're reading this, just know that I have already climbed my mountain. Which is why I'm offering my $0.02. I am choosing not to partake in the glamorization of the process it takes to attain a certain goal. Anybody that has ever put in any meaningful work to achieve something, already knows what the "behind the scenes" footage looks like. It's not beautiful at all; it's just cold, hard and strenuous work. Don't post about being "on the grind 24/7", tell me about what you've accomplished. Share your passion with the world. I just did.
Anyways, I know that happiness eludes me since I keep being fixated on the next big thing. It's been quite tumultuous attempting to change this mentality. Overanalyzing life has always been deep rooted within me. Only recently, I obtained a newfound appreciation for living in the now. At 16, I had 25-30 all planned out. Now, being between 25-30, I sometimes feel more lost than I ever have before. But that's where trusting the process and falling in love with the journey comes into play. Instead of simply focusing on the next milestone and moving on to another, finding happiness in the now until you get there, may just be the key to smiling and laughing more. This is something I've had to struggle with the most. I still do.
At the end of the day, I am always striving to be a better son, a better friend, a better citizen, but most importantly, a better human being.
Lastly, I find that we reassure ourselves so much time and time again, that dreams start feeling very far away, and they just become some unrealistic comfort, to numb the pain of our everyday life. The idea of starting a podcast(s), came to me more than 3 years ago. Since then, I have overthought, made a plethora of excuses, and let things that never mattered take full control of my life. I can't imagine what I may have accomplished, had I actually embarked on this journey those few years ago. That being said, "what could have been" is never tangible, it's always imaginary.
I now find solace in the simple fact that my words have finally turned into actions, which are loud enough and ready for your consumption.